So I think I'm going to have to start using a roller coaster metaphor to describe chronic pain or really just any chronic illness. Yesterday I woke up feeling amazing, and I mean amazing, like I could take on the world. If there was a poster girl for pain management program's I would of been it. (Oh wait I sort of already am) it was the whole 'I even have my hair up despite the fact that it ways a tone and I'll get a migraine, I'm still amazing' kinda day. I thought I could take on the world.
I think I forgot that chronic pain is a marathon not a sprint. Because in a way I sprinted through yesterday, taking on the world, feeling as much like a 'normal' person as I have in years. I went to uni and then even managed to sit through a movie... At the cinema! And I enjoyed it! Something I haven't done in forever. Sure there was a little nagging in my head and some aching in my elbow and hip, but overall nothing to actually. Stop me from enjoying the movie. Although that could have been thanks to the FREE GOLD CLASS TICKETS that I got given nearly a year ago from the board of St Vincents hospital for speaking to them about chronic pain and the program that it participated in. Took me nearly a year to the day to use them. Anyway that's not the point. See I'm forgetting the point.
So them we get to today. Completely different sort of day. It wasn't one of my overly bad, stay in bed kinda days. I just woke up feeling ridiculously tired and could already feel the migraine coming on. There was no question of whether I could manage to put my hair up in a ponytail today. The answer was always going to be no. When I was driving to uni, it occurred to me that I was so tired and sore that I wasn't paying a huge amount of attention to the road. Am I a driving risk? Gees I hope not! So I just have to keep reminding myself that normal is overrated and that I'm on a roller coaster 'that only goes up' (the fault in my starts reference, great book btw). I'm on a journey, one that is challenging but I me the end will hopefully be rewarding. Anyway now to pop some pills and sleep. My days over and mid semester break is here. Here's to a week of double time and a half pay, extra sleep and assignments.
:)
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