So I officially used up all my spoons today. Today I went with my best friend to Movieworld (a theme park), where of course I couldn't take my crutches otherwise I wouldn't have been allowed on any rides. On the drive down my thumb splint broke so I couldn't wear it (lucky I'm going to the OT tomorrow), and then we walked around and stood in lines for hours. Don't get me wrong, I had an amazing time. It was the first time I'd done something fun since basically since uni started, but I am exhausted. I remember, in the past I wouldn't have given going out a second thought, but all the walking and standing and noise really got to be today. I'm just lucky that the fatigue didn't hit too badly until I got home, not whilst I was driving. So then my question is, when is it okay to use all your spoons (energy)? I think it's a personal choice. Some things aren't worth even one spoon, whilst others I would give any/all to do. I'm glad I went today, it gave me a sense of normality, whilst showing me that I can't do everything. I just know that the consequence will be that tomorrow I'll be very very sore. And how am I going to explain my broken splint to my OT?... haha
30 Day Chronic Illness Challenge
Day 12: Briefly explain to a healthy person what it is like to live with this illness.
It's tiring. You wake up every morning and everything is a struggle, sometimes even eating is impossible. Ehlers Danlos affects every part of your body and life. The first thing I notice when I wake up is my head pounding, my dry mouth, sore jaw (due to clenched teeth), sore hip and a whole body sense of stiffness (even though that is virtually impossibly with EDS-HM). When you walk, everything cracks, I also have terrible proprioception, so I am very clumsy and crash into everything! Having EDS-HM is a bit like everything part of your body is fighting itself. Just when you think you are on the right track, another part of your body goes 'nope can't be okay with this, lets make more pain.' When my hips, or ankles, back, head, fingers or elbows aren't bad, I always have constant aches and pains. In fact, I've had these for as long as I can remember, I just thought that being in pain was normal, which I know now, clearly isn't. I could go in to more detail about what it's like to live with EDS-HM, but I'd be here for years and years and I think that there is a question later on in the challenge where I can give a more in depth explanation. Anyways... the question does say briefly...
Day 13: Has your physical illness had any effect on your mental health? Explain
Yes and no. In a way I always had stress and possibly anxiety issues being a serious overachiever, but I think that my physical illness has exacerbated my issues. I now get super stressed very easily and have not crazy anxiety issues, but they aren't good. I get very anxious especially around medical appointments and the like and I have serious acceptance issues, but who could blame me? I also do not like asking for help, so instead I just end up crawling into a corner and crying instead of seeing a psychologist, like I should have been doing for the past 2 years, and yet I am yet to see one. I have my moments, that if someone saw me in one of these, they would think I was seriously depressed, however I don't like the word 'depressed'.
BB :)
30 Day Chronic Illness Challenge
Day 12: Briefly explain to a healthy person what it is like to live with this illness.
It's tiring. You wake up every morning and everything is a struggle, sometimes even eating is impossible. Ehlers Danlos affects every part of your body and life. The first thing I notice when I wake up is my head pounding, my dry mouth, sore jaw (due to clenched teeth), sore hip and a whole body sense of stiffness (even though that is virtually impossibly with EDS-HM). When you walk, everything cracks, I also have terrible proprioception, so I am very clumsy and crash into everything! Having EDS-HM is a bit like everything part of your body is fighting itself. Just when you think you are on the right track, another part of your body goes 'nope can't be okay with this, lets make more pain.' When my hips, or ankles, back, head, fingers or elbows aren't bad, I always have constant aches and pains. In fact, I've had these for as long as I can remember, I just thought that being in pain was normal, which I know now, clearly isn't. I could go in to more detail about what it's like to live with EDS-HM, but I'd be here for years and years and I think that there is a question later on in the challenge where I can give a more in depth explanation. Anyways... the question does say briefly...
Day 13: Has your physical illness had any effect on your mental health? Explain
Yes and no. In a way I always had stress and possibly anxiety issues being a serious overachiever, but I think that my physical illness has exacerbated my issues. I now get super stressed very easily and have not crazy anxiety issues, but they aren't good. I get very anxious especially around medical appointments and the like and I have serious acceptance issues, but who could blame me? I also do not like asking for help, so instead I just end up crawling into a corner and crying instead of seeing a psychologist, like I should have been doing for the past 2 years, and yet I am yet to see one. I have my moments, that if someone saw me in one of these, they would think I was seriously depressed, however I don't like the word 'depressed'.
BB :)
Comments
Post a Comment